Dear Renée,
I am a single man and I am in a happy committed relationship. I admit my relationship hasn’t always been stable, but we are now fully committed and planning to move in together. The question is, that when I go out with friends, women flirt with me, and my friends say that I send mixed signals. The other day, I was out to lunch with two friends and a woman came over, made a move on me, and gave me a business card. I said “I am dating someone,” but she didn’t seem to care. My friends (and my girlfriend) have said that I don’t say the right words to let these girls know I am NOT interested and that I am a flirt. What’s the deal? What could I say that would make my friends and these other women know I am taken? I’m not dead, just in love. What do you suggest? I feel committed and need to know what I could say that would give the right signals.
Mixed Signals about flirting
Dear Mixed Signals,
Great Question! I understand your challenge. There is a fine line between being a friendly open person and a blatant flirt. First off, when you are in love, happy and feel content in a relationship you send out a vibe of confidence that magnetically attracts people in general. The non-verbal messages are one thing added to the casual response to women that flirt with you that make a women think you still might be open to dating other people. When you say, “I’m dating someone” that sort of leads a person to think they could have a chance. When you say “Thanks, I am in a committed relationship and am not dating anyone else” Or “I’m flattered that you flirted with me but I am in love with someone very special.” These messages send a committed vibe. There is a difference!
All couples go through challenges such as this and open communication about the level of commitment is imperative. I have many clients that aren’t clear in their communication. Remember women are auditory and love to hear how you feel and the ultimate is when you express your feeling with friends. It warms a women’s heart to know that you can express your undying love in front of people important in her life! You might want to read my book Love Mechanics to help you with all the tools you need. I know this question will help other people dealing with the same issue. Thanks!
You might consider to call me or email me for a private coaching session at the office so you could learn better communication skills! Or you may consider attending one of my SECRETS into the Minds of Women Seminars to learn how women think and surprize your girlfriend with new insights! These events are life changing!
Have a love or dating question? Need a Make Over? Email:Renée@LoveMechanics.com. Still Single? Suddenly Single? Want to liven up your love life? Join us at Rapid Dating and Rapid Social Networking events, held in cities all over Southern California. Call 310-827-1100 to RSVP and check out our www.RenéePiane.com site to get on our mailing list for events and Seminars.
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